28 August 2007

DIGIJOURNAL 025--11 AUGUST 2007

DATELINE: 11AUG07 CAMP ANACONDA

Greetings from Camp Anaconda.

It appears that we may have passed through the worst part of the summer heat. While it is still unbearably hot, especially for our guys who conduct dismounted operations, the mornings at least have grown a little cooler than they were a few weeks ago. Think of it as going from extreme pain to pain.

Often I will write about our soldiers who leave the FOB every day to go out on patrols and face the enemy. Sometimes I forget to mention all of our soldiers who do the often unglamorous work of keeping the battalion running. Sections like S6 (commo), the cooks, maintenance, S2 (intelligence), S4 (supply), S3 (plans) are just a few of the many sections that, though they may not face the same danger that a dismounted armor or infantry soldier might, are vital to keeping our equipment ready and safe and keeping our soldiers in the fight. Every soldier is important to the mission. We may not make movies about them, and we often do not think of them, but we would not be able to function without them.

I thought that as we grew accustomed to wearing our body armor that the annoyance of wearing it would fade. I thought it would get lighter as the deployment lengthened. The opposite has happened. Every time I pick up the flak vest it feels like it has gained another pound. It is such a pain to wear in the heat, and I do not even have half the weight some of our soldiers carry since I do not need ammunition. Despite the impression that some media shaped by reporting that the body armor we use is faulty, it absolutely saves lives. The vest works. While it may be a pain to wear, we always have the alternative to motivate us to keep it on, despite how our body groans underneath it.

The last item for this entry concerns the interesting feedback I have received to the posts in this blog. I spoke with some soldiers at breakfast at Patrol Base O’Ryan, and as we conversed they brought up this website. I did pause for a moment, because I knew that the harshest yet best critics of what I wrote would be the soldiers I write about. They told me (and I think they were being honest, or as honest as they could be to the chaplain without ripping into his opinion) that it was “pretty good,” which I took to mean around the C+/B- range. The number one critique is that they wanted more pictures, which I will correct this week.

Thanks to you for keeping us in your prayers. We are definitely at a very difficult part of our deployment, and our soldiers truly appreciate all the kindness and support that you give to them.

Gratia et Veritas,
Warhorse Archangel


CHAPLAIN'S BOOKSHELF

The Cloister Walk
By Kathleen Norris


This is a wonderful collection of essays and reflections by an author who had drifted away from the faith of her childhood faith but then returned via two paths when her Protestant (Presbyterian) roots combined with her experience as a lay member of a Catholic (Benedictine) order. Ms. Norris touches on such far ranging topics as life on the Western Plains of North Dakota, the challenges of teaching poetry to elementary school children, and the shaping struggles of marriage, all through the eyes of a very modern believer who is nonetheless grounded in the very ancient traditions of Christianity. A very good read for those who wish to discover the gifts of the contemplative life.

The Moon Is Down
By John Steinbeck


In 1941, the Noble Prize winning author, John Steinbeck, was asked to write a play for the Office of Strategic Services as part of a counterpropaganda effort by the United States as its involvement in WWII developed. The result was not a play but this small novella. Set in a provincial and unnamed town, it chronicles the inescapable escalation of violence and suffering as a small German contingent slowly loses control of the local population. It is still a very modern book that accurately describes some of the situations we have encountered in Iraq.

Casino Royale
By Ian Fleming


While many have seen the James Bond movies, few have read the novels upon which the films are based. This was the first Bond book written by the former British Naval Intelligence Officer Ian Fleming. While the most recent cinematic adaptation of this work was great, as with any other attempt to make a movie out of a book, much was lost in the process. The James Bond of the novels is a much more complex and fallible character than the Bond of the films.

12 August 2007

DISPATCH 017--8 AUGUST 2007

Dear Friends,

The Warhorse Battalion continues to make headway in bringing stability to our area, with each new sunrise bringing us closer to home. The soldiers have acted professionally and compassionately despite the many hateful things they have witnessed and fought, and I cannot say enough how proud you should be that they have responded to evil by doing what is good.

We have entered the eleventh month of the deployment knowing we must wait until December for our return. No time in a deployment is easy, but, according to recent studies done by Army psychologists, we are in the most difficult period. For some, the coping skills that we have been using do not work like they once did. It is easy, as we look into what I call “the iron tongue of midnight,” to begin to wonder if there will be a dawn.

I will not give you a list of examples or pat proverbs to try to encourage you to do what you have already been doing—-persevering. Fifteen months is a long time to be away from the one you love, and fifteen months is a long time to constantly soldier. The best defense against despair is to have faith in those timeless aspects of our lives that are important: our vows, our families, our friendships, and, for some, our God. Let us not let temptation or indifference destroy what we have built, nurtured, and defended.

Your home-front sacrifices and successes have exceeded ours downrange. We still have much for which to be thankful. May we also remind ourselves that we do not endure alone. There are many around you who know what it was like to say goodbye after a mid-tour leave, to worry about your soldier’s safety, and to pray for a safe return.

I have included, belatedly, three of the topics I promised to address in an earlier dispatch. Let me offer a disclaimer before you continue. I am not a psychologist nor do I believe I am an expert on all these things. I write about them based on my reading, my observing of patterns, and my own personal experience. Many would disagree with my conclusion or focus on different things. My main purpose for addressing these issues is to remind us that the end is in sight and to get folks thinking about the next phase in our deployment, coming home. It does not end when we get off the plane. We should be as energetic in our preparations for return as we were to leave.

Grace and Truth,
Warhorse Shepherd


REDEPLOYMENT TOPICS


  • I. EMOTIONAL/SPIRITUAL ADJUSTMENTS

    • A. Post Traumatic Stress Disorder

      • Some studies state that as many as 22% of our returning soldiers will suffer from PTSD.
      • Those who have deployed multiple times will often suffer a relapse from prior episodes or compound existing PTSD that was not treated.
      • PTSD may be the cause but is not a rationale or excuse for reckless and/or irresponsible behavior.
      • Not every soldier will have PTSD.
      • The vast majority of soldiers will face few long-term challenges as they redeploy and adjust to being at home.
      • A new theory suggests that each person has a different limit of how much stress they can take, and this is also affected by prior stress events (turbulent childhood, car accident, etc.).
      • Every PTSD event is specific to the individual soldier.
      • There are numerous PTSD symptoms, ranging from insomnia to outright violence.
      • The earlier the soldier and/or family member receives treatment the better.
      • Be proactive in your pursuit of treatment.
      • Take PTSD seriously. It is a disease that doctors can and should treat. I would also share a very non-politically-correct view of PTSD. Some folks might claim to suffer from PTSD when in fact they are using it to validate their experience in Iraq. For example: consider the soldier who claims to suffer from PTSD caused by a mortar attack when in fact he was never directly threatened. The vast majority of our Warhorse soldiers do operate at the “pointy tip of the spear.” They have seen and faced trauma.
      • The cliché is usually correct: the soldiers who talk about combat the least are the ones who have seen the most.

    • B. Seeking counseling

      • Seeking counseling is not showing weakness.
      • Soldiers should seek counseling earlier rather than later. Please do not “white knuckle” it after redeployment, ignoring a problem in hopes that it would go away.
      • It is easy to confuse normal adjustment patterns with PTSD.
      • Generally, it is good to talk about things.
      • Contrary to what most think, seeking and receiving counseling will not hurt a career.
      • It is usually a good idea, if a licensed physician recommends it, to take medicine for treatment. However, it is usually not good to rely on medication alone.

    • C. Making a big decision

      • Try to avoid if possible making a big life decision (buying a house, changing careers, etc.) immediately upon redeployment.
      • Before you make a big decision, allow for the normal, communication avenues to re-establish themselves in your relationship.

    • D. Depression

      • Is a real disease that is often biochemical as well as emotional in nature.
      • Over one third of all women and one fourth of all men will suffer from a serious bout of depression in their lifetime.
      • Periodic depression, getting “the blues,” is a normal part of life. If it persists and/or begins to drastically alter your lifestyle or thoughts, seek treatment.
      • Can be dangerous if left untreated.
      • Risky behaviors and major personality shifts are signs of serious depression.

DIGIJOURNAL 024--30 JULY 2007

DATELINE: 30JUL07 PATROL BASE PALIWODA

A Country to Fight For
An old saw has it that the best proof of a man's loyalties lies in the sports teams he roots for. If so, Iraq's fairytale 1-0 victory yesterday over Saudi Arabia in soccer's Asia Cup--and the euphoria it inspired from Basra to Baghdad to Kirkuk--is a timely reminder that Iraq is not just a notional country.

"Once again, our national team has shown that there is only one, united Iraq," Sabah Shaiyal, a Baghdad policeman, told the Associated Press. "You can see the national feeling," added one Abu Baqir of Sadr City to a reporter from the New York Times. "It has always been there, and we hope this winning will be the beginning of the end of sectarianism."

It is easy to get carried away by the symbolism of a single soccer victory. Still, it was remarkable that the winning team -- known as the "Lions of the Two Rivers"--was Iraqi in the broadest sense of the word. Younis Mahmoud, the team captain who scored the winning goal, is Turkman. Teammate Hawar Mulla Mohammed, who put the ball into position, is Kurdish. Goalkeeper Noor Sabri is Shiite Arab.

No less remarkable were the circumstances in which the team had to train and compete. Coach Jorvan Vieira of Brazil had to move the Iraqi players beyond their political differences. The team, which could not train on home turf, went from match to match in economy seats. (Their Saudi rivals travelled more comfortably.) The celebration of their previous victory, over South Korea, was cut short by a suicide bombing that killed 50.

Yet for everything they lacked, the Iraqis had a powerful if intangible asset over their more pampered rivals: a country to fight for. Perhaps their victory will give all Iraqis a taste of what they may yet achieve together.

fromThe Wall Street Journal, 30 July 2007, p. A12


Yesterday was an unusual and interesting day that in many ways summarizes the kind of character our soldiers have.

For the Religious Support Team, or RST—-consisting of yours truly and the loyal and capable chaplain assistant CPL C, we began this Sunday with our worship service. Afterwards, we spoke of how thankful we were that things had been relatively quiet in our particular sector. When I use the word quiet, I do not mean absence of war, violence, or danger, but just not as much. Our commander, Warhorse 6, put it best—-the Iraqis in our area of operation (AO) had begun to be more worried about the price of government-provided gas than they were about getting killed.

Around lunchtime, a huge explosion shattered the oppressively hot but quiet afternoon. One of our battalion surgeons, Doc B, said he saw a Mount Saint Helens-like mushroom cloud rising in the sky on the horizon. The insurgents had hit one of the Iraqi-manned checkpoints with a vehicle-borne, improvised explosive device (VBIED). After our command sergeant major, Warhorse 9, notified us, we rushed over to the aid station and awaited the incoming casualties.

One of the first things I ask is whether any of our soldiers were hurt. Fortunately none were, but we still had human beings coming into the aid station in various stages of trauma.

And speaking of trauma, one of our docs told me that, in his conversations with the doctors down at the combat surgical hospital (CaSH) at Anaconda, they admitted that even rotations at inner-city trauma centers had not prepared them for the types of injuries they've seen soldiers sustain in war.

I wish I could say I enter the aid station courageously and without fear when I know that there is a high probability that something horrific awaits on the other side of the door. My stomach still turns and I have to pray just to cross the threshold. CPL C, as the son of a nurse (and much braver man than I), seems to have an easier time dealing with the sights, sounds, and smells of the aid station.

Our two surgeons and several of our medics were huddled around the litter of an 11- year-old girl who happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time. As the terrorists were launching their attacks, they also sent in mortar rounds to the local city of Balad. The insurgents tend to be foreign nationals or former, disgruntled members of the military. Of the foreign nationals, the vast majority of them come from Saudi Arabia, whose main exports seem to be oil and hate.

The girl and her father were working in a field when the mortars landed. A recent news item tells the story of an American soldier writing a column under an alias for a newspaper back in the States. The column has been controversial due to his claims of atrocities committed by his fellow soldiers against local Iraqis. Contrast those farcical tales with the scene of seven soldiers working feverishly to save this girl. CPL C and I stood in the background, with our medical gloves on, looking for any way we could help.

The girl died despite all the treatment. Our soldiers covered her up, prepared her body with dignity, and the RST went outside to tell her two uncles who waited for news. Communicating through a translator, we assured the men that our docs had done all that they could. They were appreciative, but their faces wore the hue of resignation that comes from having to pick up dead loved ones too many times. We helped carry the body to the waiting truck, and back we went to the aid station.

Our medical personnel continued to attend to the incoming Iraqi police and soldiers, and we were able to medically evacuate (MEDEVAC-usually by Blackhawk helicopter) the serious injuries to the CaSH.

When things quieted down, we began to walk back to the chapel and our offices (I call it the chapel complex to make it sound important). I spoke with some soldiers who were milling about, but out of the corner of my eye I saw one of our interpreters, Tupac, weeping. You might wonder about the names. Out of concerns for their safety, we give our interpreters nicknames, usually the names of rappers or historical mafia figures. I went up to him, and Tupac told me he had lost his neighbor and school-boy friend in the blast. His tears reminded me that despite what we hear or what we have come to think, there are still many brave Iraqis trying to make their country work. The soldiers who died or were wounded are young men who courageously stood out on the line, in the heat, attempting to make their country safe.

Later that evening, we conducted evening worship services. Celebratory gunfire greeted us as we left the chapel. I knew that the Iraqi national soccer team must have defeated the Saudis in the finals of the Asia Cup. Since the terminal velocity of a descending bullet is the same as when it leaves the muzzle, I encouraged everyone to stay under thick ceilings for awhile. I was and am happy for the Iraqis.

At the end of the day I had the following thoughts that I thought the people at home might want to know.

  • Our soldiers, despite long deployments and changing strategies, continue to be some of the most professional and compassionate people (my italics) I have ever known.
  • Having a morally upstanding chain of command makes all the difference in the world.
  • Leadership is everything at all levels.
  • The Iraqi people are incredibly resilient. They can be very frustrating, but this is mostly due to cultural differences than it is to ethical deficiencies. At the ground level there are many courageous men and women who refuse to be terrorized by homicidal killers, aka terrorists, Al Qaeda, etc.
  • Aside from the Divine, soccer is the most important democratic force in the universe.
  • Our AO is still safe and making progress. Everything did not unravel despite the terrorists best efforts.
  • It is a sad commentary that humanity allows a girl to die just because she was born into the “wrong-believing” family.
  • It is a hopeful commentary on humanity that so many people, Iraqi and American, worked to save her life and many others in response to the attacks by cowards.


Please continue to keep us in your prayers. Our soldiers are great men and women, and I still get choked up when I see the things they do. Take care.

Gratia et Veritas,
Warhorse Archangel


SUPPORT SPOTLIGHT
FIRST BAPTIST CHURCH, WOODBRIDGE, VA

Snacks, clothes, toiletries, books, and Bible studies have all emerged from the boxes sent by this faithful congregation. By keeping us in their prayers, sending us the items that improve our living conditions, and giving us spiritually edifying things to read, this church has made our "adventure vacation" a little more bearable. Thank you.


CHAPLAIN'S BOOKSHELF

Home Fires Burning: Married to the Military—for Better or Worse
by Karen Houppert



Ms. Houppert, growing up the daughter of a career Air Force pilot, losing him in a training accident when she was just 11 years old, has a great deal of personal experience with the military. In her book she follows several Army wives from Ft. Drum as they cope with their husbands’ deployments as part of the 10th Mountain Division. While not always flattering, I believe her book is nonetheless very truthful. It provides an especially valuable insight into the challenges of the wives of lower enlisted soldiers.

Under the Sabers: The Unwritten Code of Army Wives
by Tanya Biank



A daughter of a career Army Colonel, a wife of an Army officer, and a reporter for the local Fayetteville, NC (Fort Bragg) paper, Ms Biank chronicles the lives of several Ft. Bragg wives, highlighting the circumstances surrounding the four homicides that took place in 2003-2004 after soldiers returned from deployments to Afghanistan and Iraq. Her book stems from the nationally recognized articles she published as a military correspondent for Ft. Bragg. Her work is also the source for the new Lifetime Channel series Army Wives. A very honest description of the highs and lows that Army wives experience.

The Road
by Cormac McCarthy


In his fictional account of life in post-apocalyptic America, Mr. McCarthy accurately describes the powerful feelings a loving father has for his son as they travel “the road” to safety on the coast. Using a quasi-Odyssey like journey, his novel also tells of the painful fears fathers have for their sons as they live in a world that causes them to grow up much too soon.

DIGIJOURNAL 023--19 JULY 2007

DATELINE: 19JUL07 PATROL BASE PALIWODA

A LETTER TO JOSHUA

My Beloved Son,

It seems like I have been thinking about you more than usual. I think about you because of this separation and the effect that it has on you and us. Boys your age normally have a difficult time communicating their feelings about “daddy” being gone. Perhaps you think that I love the Army more than you or that I enjoy being away. Nothing could be further from the truth.

Every day that passes finds me loving you even more. I wish I had a job that I loved that did not keep me away from home for so long. I wish I had a job where all I had to do would be to take you to school and then play with you when we returned home. Unfortunately and fortunately, God has called me to minister to the military. Since He has called me, I pray and have faith that He will help our family navigate during these difficult times.

I want you to know that I have resolved to come back a better father. I need to play with you more. I should never refuse an opportunity to spend time with you.

Soon, boy, before you know it, you will be a man. But I will always remember you as my little boy with a great laugh and piercing blue eyes. The little boy who, thankfully, has so much of his mother in him. The little boy who makes me proud when he holds my hand and calls me Daddy.

I love you,
Daddy


Gratia et Veritas,
Warhorse Archangel


SUPPORT SPOTLIGHT
WATERMARK CHURCH, Dallas, TX

This congregation has a military ministry that has sent numerous boxes, sermons, Bible studies, and other items to our soldiers. They have taken the time to write our soldiers, telling them of their support. It seems like their boxes seem to arrive at times when we are feeling down. Some would call that luck; I call it providence. Thank you Watermark.


CHAPLAIN'S BOOKSHELF

COMBAT
Warriors: Portraits from the Battlefield
by Max Hastings


Mr. Hastings, a noted English military historian, compiles the life stories of sixteen war heroes from various nations during the 19th and 20th centuries. Written for the laymen as well as the serious scholar, Mr. Hastings takes care to point out not only the battlefield successes of these 15 men and 1 woman but also their post-war struggles. The author, in addition to the historical facts, also gives us some of the underlying psychological tensions involved with the characters. A great book…I could not put it down.

Lone Survivor: The Eyewitness Account of Operation Redwing and the Lost Heroes of Seal Team 10
by Marcus Luttrell with Patrick Robinson


Marcus Luttrell is a native Texan who grew up wanting to be a Navy Seal. The first half of the book deals with the harrowing experience of Seal training, with the second half describing the mission of Operation Redwing in Afghanistan. The strength of the book comes from the telling of ethical dilemmas that arise in combat and how soldiers prepare for and confront them. He highlights how training must be as difficult as possible in peacetime so that military personnel can face the challenges of combat.

Brave Men, Gentle Heroes: American Fathers and Sons in World War II and Vietnam
by Michael Takiff


Michael Takiff has put together this marvelous collection of stories and interviews of fathers who served in WWII and sons who served in Vietnam. The value it has for military families is the honest portrayal of the lessons learned and burdens shared by military personnel who deploy and return home from combat. It helps the reader get a more developed picture of what these heroes face before, during, and after war. It also shows that many of these men can return home as better husbands and fathers as they begin to reflect on what has happened to them.

CULTURE
The Kite Runner
by Khaled Hosseini


Dr. Hosseini, who spent his childhood in Afghanistan until his family was forced to flee during the Soviet occupation, has not only written the first English novel by a native Afghan but, more importantly, a great novel that combines evil, betrayal, redemption, and hope. In The Kite Runner, Dr. Hosseini chronicles the lives of two boys who grow up in the Afghan capital of Kabul, with one staying after the occupation while one flees to America. The book humanizes the Afghan and, by extension, the Arab peoples by getting behind the disjointed stares we often see out on patrol and instead telling their stories and their dreams. A great work of fiction that forces us to re-examine some of the prejudices we might hold against the culture of this part of the world.

A Thousand Splendid Suns
by Khalid Hosseini


This is the second and most recent book by Dr. Hoseini. It takes place in the same setting as The Kite Runner, but now telling the story of two Afghan women whose lives become entwined during the Soviet occupation and subsequent Taliban takeover. It is an unflinching glimpse of life behind the veil for two women, one modern and one pre-modern, and how they cope with life’s challenges while developing into their own identities.

The Cairo Trilogy: Palace Walk, Palace of Desire, Sugar Street
by Naguib Mahfouz


Many scholars consider Mr. Mahfouz, an Egyptian and Nobel Prize winner, the first Arab novelist. The Cairo Trilogy tells the tale of an upper middle-class Egyptian family whose tranquil existence collides with the forces tearing at the modern Arab world. A fictional narrative of the larger cultural and religious issues that afflict the region, Mr. Mahfouz brings out the human inconsistencies of his characters as they pursue various lives to deal with the forces that threaten to consume them.

HOMEFRONT
Courage After Fire: Coping Strategies for Troops Returning from Iraq and Afghanistan and Their Families
by Keith Armstrong, Suzanne Best, and Paula Domenici


This is a book of lists compiled by three mental health care professionals. By using a quasi-PowerPoint style instead of a narrative, the strength of the book comes from the way it lays out in detail the reactions families can expect from their returning family members and themselves. The authors also list all the resources available to the family to address particular issues. Another good aspect of this book is that it stresses not only negative but positive things can come out of a deployment.

The Homefront Club: The Hardheaded Woman’s Guide to Raising a Military Family
by Jacey Eckhart


I highly recommend this very readable and funny book. Ms. Eckhart grew up as the daughter of an Air Force fighter pilot swearing that she would never marry anyone in the military. At age 20 she promptly married the only Navy guy she ever dated. Ms. Eckhart uses humor to address serious topics such as dealing with loss, raising children, and when to stay in or get out of the military. She sheds light on the changing culture of the military and the different expectations it has for wives and children. In a perfect world, every FRG leader and every wife would receive this book prior to a deployment.

DIGIJOURNAL 022--13 JULY 2007

DATELINE: 13JUL07 PATROL BASE PALIWODA

PHYSICAL COURAGE
Greetings from Paliwoda. CPL C and I just returned from visiting our D Company “Dragoons” up at Patrol Base Brasfield-Mora. They are doing well and have been keeping up with all those speed bumps, also known as the 82nd Airborne Division. We had a good time, and their morale is good as we head into the final stretch of this deployment.

We experienced a little excitement on the flight up to Brasfield. Last time we flew, CPL C had a dog and then a MP barf next to him. This trip, after taking off from Paliwoda, we apparently received some gunfire directed at the Blackhawk. This I did not see, but what I did see was our door-gunner light up whoever was shooting at us. Judging from the sheer amount of ammo he poured into his target, I am pretty sure that that particular enemy fighter had a very bad day.

One of the things that I want to share with you is to describe the raw, physical courage that our troopers display on a daily basis. The best way to illustrate this is to tell you about the conditions in which they operate.

I just finished reading The Lone Survivor by Marcus Luttrell. Luttrell is a Navy Seal who, despite losing three of his closest friends in an ambush, managed to survive in the mountains of Afghanistan for five days before a group of Army Rangers rescued him. In the beginning of his book he mentions all the tortuous types of training that prospective Seals must endure before they can don the coveted trident of their branch. Time and time again he is told by his instructors that it is mental, not physical, toughness that will get them through difficult times.

Our soldiers must be mentally tough as well in order to face the environment of combat. Every day the temperature hits the low to mid 120s, and at night it only drops to 100-105. In the morning, our guys roll out in their Bradley Fighting Vehicles, carrying three crew and up to 9 dismounts in the back. These dismounts, with a full combat load of ammo, grenades, flares, aid bags, body armor, etc., carry roughly 100 lbs. of extra weight. The temperature inside the vehicles can rise to up to 200 degrees. Ice melts in 30 minutes, and the water they carry can be as hot as coffee as they drink it down.

And drink it down they must, for it takes only a few minutes for one to go from heat exhaustion to the life-threatening condition of heat stroke. In and out of the Bradleys these guys move in sector, with long foot patrols breaking up the monotony of riding in a mobile pizza oven. By the way, as they roam the battlefield, they are looking for IEDs, avoiding sniper and RPG fire, scanning for enemy, shaking hands with the locals, discerning who is friendly and who is not, passing out school supplies, and generally trying to be the warrior-diplomat that we ask them to be. After doing this all day, these guys return to the base exhausted and drained.

Throughout our history, many American fighting men have faced tougher conditions. I think of the 101st at Bastogne or First Cav in the Ia Drang Valley. However, our soldiers still must dig deep every day just to make the mission happen. I have always said that I am just an observer, a witness to what this generation can and is doing. No matter what history eventually says about this conflict, the men and women of 3/8 CAV will be able to hold their heads up when they think of what they have done and overcome.

SUPPORT SPOTLIGHT
VAUGHN HENRY

Mr. Henry is a part of the Adopt-a-Chaplain network. He has personally taken us under his wing. He usually sends 2-4 boxes every week, filled with donuts for the commo shop, drink mixes for me, and DVD movies and TV shows for our media library. All these endeavors take time and cost money, and I do not even want to think about the total amount of either that he has spent on us. It has been very much appreciated.

Gratia et Veritas,
Warhorse Archangel

DISPATCH 016--13 JULY 2007

PREP FOR REDEPLOYMENT

Warhorse Family Members and Friends,

We are approaching mid-summer, and as our children attend camps or other activities and while moms begin to plan for the upcoming school year, I wonder if some of us are not feeling a bit frazzled. We faced a great challenge when we heard about the news of our extension. It takes some mental and emotional discipline to readjust one’s “coming home” clock by adding three months. Many soldiers, like me, had to make the painful adjustment on the count down timers we keep on our computer desktops. We charge ahead with our missions, eagerly thinking and dreaming of home.

One of the phenomena that my wife and I, and, from what we have heard, many other couples have faced, is the post-leave let-down. If leave went well, the goodbyes were difficult, and the brief respite we experienced by having two people around to help with household and child responsibilities came to an end. We have entered, perhaps, the most difficult part of the deployment—-the finish. Our patience, understanding, and tolerance for each other, the Army, and the war have, for many of us, reached a breaking point. I want to acknowledge that the trials you have faced personally and as a family are real. As military families, your challenges are unique, and ones that very few Americans can understand. When I talk with our soldiers, one of the themes that I hear over and over again is how much they appreciate what you are doing on the home front.

There is good news amidst the frustration and the loneliness—-redeployment. At times it may seem too far in the future to think about, but it is closer than we think. My plan is to write more frequently about some of the topics that will be helpful as we prepare for our reunions. At the end of this letter, I have enclosed a rough outline of the topics. If you see something that is missing or you want to respond to a topic, please do not hesitate to send me an email at kevin.wainwright@hotmail.com.

Before I share the outline, I would like to state my disclaimer about anything I write. I am not some fount of wisdom (just ask my wife, household 6) that claims to know and see all. In fact, most of the advice or opinions I share I sometimes have a difficult time following myself. I am reminded about the article I read in Time magazine when this war started, mentioning how some of the soldier’s wives were taken aback and even insulted by some of the briefings they received from their unit chaplains. In no way is any of this meant to be condescending. Instead, it is my hope to share some of the patterns I have either seen or read about when it comes to redeployment issues and adjustments. My family and I will be going through the same things ourselves, so I will have much to learn.

I would like to close by saying thank you for your service and your sacrifice. The Warhorse leadership cannot say this enough. We are able to do what we do, fight and win on the battlefield, because of what you do for us at home. You are the most important contributor to the emotional and spiritual morale of our soldiers. We will continue to keep you in our prayers, both individually and collectively during chapel services, as we prepare to finish our mission here strong and safe. God bless you all.

Honor et Ferocitas (Honor and Courage)
Warhorse Shepherd


BOOK REVIEWS
From time to time I will mention some of the books I am reading, especially if I think they will help soldiers, their families, and supporters back home better understand what life is like over here.

The Long Road Home: A Story of War and Family
by Martha Raddatz


The Long Road Home is an excellent book that has been making the rounds through our battalion. I know her book is good when all the soldiers who read it agree with the perspective offered by Ms. Raddatz. The book chronicles the battle the 2/5 Cavalry Battalion fought in OIF II as it was taking over its area of operations. Up to that point, relatively speaking, Sadr City was fairly docile. Everything exploded when the 1st Cavalry Division came in to swap out with the First Armored Division. The strength of this narrative is that the author sticks to reporting the facts, which are dramatic enough. She also tells the story of the wives and families back at Ft. Hood as the news of the battle and the casualties began to trickle in from Iraq. I have spoken to several soldiers in our battalion who were in 2-5 during their last rotation, and they all agree that this book is an accurate portrayal. I will make the early prediction that, when they make a movie out of this book, it will have a similar impact that Blackhawk Down had for our understanding of the war in Somalia.

Brave Men, Gentle Heroes: American Fathers and Sons in World War II and Vietnam
by Michael Takiff


Michael Takiff has put together this marvelous collection of stories and interviews of fathers who served in WWII and sons who served in Vietnam. The value it has for military families is the honest portrayal of the lessons learned and burdens shared by military personnel who deploy and return home from combat. It helps the reader get a more developed picture of what these heroes face before, during, and after war. It also shows that many of these men can return home as better husbands and fathers as they begin to reflect on what has happened to them.


REDEPLOYMENT TOPICS


  • I. Emotional/Spiritual Adjustments

    • A. Post Traumatic Stress Disorder
    • B. Seeking counseling
    • C. Making a big decision
    • D. Depression

  • II. Red Alert: When Depression Can Turn Deadly

    • A. Suicide prevention
    • B. Addictive behavior
    • C. The Demon of Anger

  • III. Growing Closer

    • A. Changes in relationships
    • B. Adjustment back to family life
    • C. Who is in charge?
    • D. It is both/and, not either/or
    • E. Sharing your dreams
    • F. Recommit to your vows
    • G. The challenge and blessing of intimacy
    • H. The first fight: a marital growth opportunity

  • IV. Healing the Wounded

    • A. Grace and forgiveness
    • B. Limits of understanding
    • C. Suffering and growth
    • D. Acknowledging the pain
    • E. Not everybody will come home to a happy ending
    • F. Daddy’s war blanket: family rituals and their role in healing
    • G. And there I was: how war stories can help

  • V. Listen before Fixing (Read the instructions)

    • A. Sacrifices on the home front
    • B. Sacrifices while deployed
    • C. The dangers of score-keeping
    • D. Communicate, communicate, communicate

  • VI. Remember the Kids

    • A. Mentor and include your children
    • B. Learning from your children

  • VII. For the Spartans (Single Soldiers)

    • A. They need our support, too
    • B. Who are their mentors?
    • C. What can their families do to help?
    • D. Setting goals
    • E. Safe celebrations

  • VIII. Practical Advice

    • A. Adjusting your finances
    • B. Preparing for a move

  • IX. Have a Plan (for those who are ETSing)

    • A. What is your plan?
    • B. How will you support your family?
    • C. The reality of civilian life
    • D. Take advantage of what the Army has to offer
    • E. Thank you for your service

  • X. Your support network

    • A. Chaplains
    • B. Counselors
    • C. Friends & extended family

  • XI. Grappling with Reality

    • A. The next deployment
    • B. Upcoming retirement

DIGIJOURNAL 021--4 JULY 2007

DATELINE: 4JUL07 PATROL BASE PALIWODA

FAITH
What follows is the letter I sent to my youngest son, Nathanael, for his third birthday. Three years ago, on July 5th, Heather and I welcomed him into the world. Or, to be more accurate, Heather welcomed him in because I was over here when he arrived. After he was born, the nurses noticed some irregularities with his breathing, and they whisked him away to the ICU where he spent most of his first week of life. After several days of testing and monitoring, Nate’s system stablized and he was released from the hospital. During that week, however, spotty communication with Heather combined with my imagination, and I began to think the worst. Fortunately, this story has a happy ending, but it was the most traumatic thing that I have ever experienced.

As you read this, understand that my story is not unique, for many soldiers have shared the same experience. What is amazing about them is that both parents, despite the challenges of separation and deployment, continue to function. Life and soldiering must go on, and I hope this gives you an idea of the type of sacrifice that our military families make in order to support their soldier and their country.

My Beloved Son,
Your name comes from the Old Testament Hebrew and means “gift from God.” After all that I went through when you were born, you have definitely lived up to your title. You were born in the summer of 2004 while I was in Iraq on my first tour. After much debate, your mother and I decided that it would be better for me to come home for R&R leave after you were born instead of before. We both wanted me to spend as much time with you and Josh as possible. I will always admire your mother’s courage for having to face her pregnancy and your delivery without me by her side. I had classmates at West Point who were born while their fathers were in Vietnam, and it amazed me how their young mothers maintained any shred of sanity while pregnant, listening to the news, and wondering if their child would have a father.

You came early, three weeks early, but you were still considered full-term. I was on my way to a morning staff meeting when our S1, the guy in charge of personnel and administrative stuff, said to me, “By the way, chaplain, your son was born this morning.” I did not attend the meeting. Instead I rushed to the Brigade Chaplain’s office, got a satellite phone, and called home.

Your mother was doing very well, but she sounded worried. She told me that there had been some complications, that your blood counts were off, and that you were in ICU. She said that you would be fine and that you were only in the special ward because they wanted to take precautions. During the next three days your condition seemed to rise and fall with every phone call. I would call in the morning, and your condition would be worse, but in the afternoon you would be better. It was heart-breaking, and I felt so helpless because I was in Iraq and could not be back there with you or your mother. This is the great challenge of serving two families, the Army family and one's own family—-sometimes you have to betray one in order to honor the other.

I learned much about my faith-life then. I would stand in front of soldiers and talk about maintaining our faith in God during tough times, and I meant it and still do, but now I had to walk the walk. One night, things were real bad, and I remember one of our lieutenants knocking on my door in the middle of the night. Usually this meant that someone had lost a family member or had to receive bad news. When I looked at his face, it was completely white. All the blood had run out of it, and it was then that I knew that the knock was for me.

The only time your mother ever cried during my whole deployment was when I called that night. She asked me if I could come home early on emergency leave because you were having trouble. I always felt as a chaplain that I had to support my chain of command, and often my support took place when I would tell a soldier that his life crisis was a crisis but did not merit him going home on emergency leave. Now I was that soldier. I will always remember the words I had to speak to your mother, my wife, when I told her that, unless you were dead or dying, I could not come home. Her voice cracked, but she then recovered and said that you were not that bad. After I hung up I wondered if she would ever forgive me.

I believe that we must always seek for and do God’s will, and I did not think that I should somehow be immune from life’s fair share of calamities. But I remember bargaining with God throughout your entire first week. I specifically said that I did not care if I had to change your diapers until you were 65; I just wanted you to live. I also prayed that your mother would not be so devastated by your sickness and/or death that our marriage would disintegrate as well. Part of me felt selfish for praying that, but part of me did not.

I remember thinking some quirky things after you were born. I kept asking your mother time and time again was she sure that my name was on your birth certificate. It became an obsession. I also repeatedly asked if they spelled your name correctly. Most people spell Nathaniel with an “ie.” Since I always liked Hebrew more that Greek, I insisted on spelling it the Old Testament way, Nathanael, with an “ae.” So now you know who to blame when you have to forever correct people on how to spell your name. At least I did not name you Sue.

Three years have passed, and I am back in Iraq, and you are still here. Your mom and I think you will be the child that will age us. You still have some lingering health issues, but you have so far managed to overcome all the little physical hiccups that came with your life. I, or rather your mother, still have to change your diapers, but you are showing that you might even grow out of that. I hope you do before I get home.

Because of this war and how you came to us, I will always think of you with both joy and sorrow. I worried so much that it is really the only thing that I think about that might be classified as PTSD. You are such a smart and handsome little boy. My heart sings every time you grab my hand, whether it is to show me how you sneak cookies when your mother is not looking or when you want to shoot baskets on your small hoop. You were and are a gift from God. Happy Birthday from your father.


SUPPORT SPOTLIGHT
AMERICAN ASSOCIATION of VETERANS, Illinois

The American Association of Veterans from Illinois sent the 3/8 BN several hundred flame retardant shirts to wear under our uniforms. I tried to get them out to as many of our "trigger-pullers" as possible. This group also sent several hundred dollars worth of phone cards that were eagerly snatched up by our soldiers stationed at LSAA. Thank you AMVETS for thinking of us when you were looking for projects to work on over here.

CHAPLAIN'S BOOKSHELF
The Long Road Home: A Story of War and Family by Martha Raddatz



From time to time I will mention some of the books I am reading, especially if I think they will help soldiers, their families, and supporters back home better understand what life is like over here. The Long Road Home is an excellent book that has been making the rounds through our battalion. I know a book is good when all the soldiers who read it agree with the perspective offered by Ms. Raddatz. The book chronicles the battle the 2/5 Cavalry Battalion fought in OIF II as it was taking over its battlespace from the previous unit. Up to that point, relatively speaking, Sadr City was fairly docile. Everything exploded when the 1st Cavalry Division came in to swap out with the First Armored Division. The strength of this narrative is that the author sticks to reporting the facts, which are dramatic enough. She also tells the story of the wives and families back at Ft. Hood as the news of the battle and the casualties began to trickle in from Iraq. I have spoken to several soldiers in our battalion who were in 2-5 during their last rotation, and they all agreed that this book is an accurate portrayal. I will make the early prediction that, when they make a movie out of this book, it will have a similar impact that Blackhawk Down had for our understanding of the war in Somalia.

Gratia et Veritas,
Warhorse Archangel

LETTER to ARMED FORCES SUPPORT COALITION--21 JUNE 2007

21JUN07

DOES YOUR VIDEO MATCH YOUR AUDIO?

“For just as the body without the spirit is dead, so also faith without works is dead.” James 2:26

James wrote these words as a way to hold early Christians accountable. Whether one is a Christian or not, it is easy to discover the folks who tend to say one thing and do another. As I like to say, their video does not match their audio.

Does our video match our audio when we say, regardless of what our position is concerning the war, that we support our troops? It is easy to slap a yellow ribbon on the back of a car, raise the flag, and proclaim loudly that one supports our soldiers, but it is entirely another thing to make a real sacrifice of time and money in order to support them. This is exactly what the Armed Forces Support Coalition (AFSC) of Durango, Colorado has done.

The AFSC has sent hundreds of boxes full of needed items to deployed soldiers. As the chaplain for the Third Battalion, Eighth Cavalry Regiment, I have received 20-30 boxes a week…for the last six months. The 800 soldiers that I serve have almost come to expect their weekly ration of goodies from the AFSC. Their charity, however, goes even further than that, for they have not only sent items for our soldiers to use but also for our soldiers to pass out to the Iraqi civilians, especially the children.

What individuals and/or groups participate in or belong to the AFSC? One would be surprised, like I was, at the political and social diversity of this organization. We have had several books stores, including those on the alternative side of the social spectrum, provide enough books for our battalion to have three separate libraries, one at each patrol base, for our soldiers. Individuals and organizations have sent much needed toiletry items for our men and women who do not live near a big base. They have sent stuffed toys, backpacks, and school supplies for our troopers to distribute to the Iraqi children in our area of operation, and they have done all this despite the wide-range of views concerning the overall purpose and rationale for this war.

Some might cynically scoff at these efforts to help soldiers and Iraqi civilians by saying that what the AFSC provides is but a drop in an ocean size bucket of need. In some ways they would be correct. I can tell you, however, that real, concrete benefits have come because some small businesses and organizations have taken the time to reach out to us.

The most important thing they have done is to communicate to our deployed troopers that they have not been forgotten. As the war has lengthened, one of my concerns is that we would be pushed aside by the Anna Nicole Smiths and the Paris Hiltons of the world. It would be easy and in some ways understandable for the average American to begin to disconnect from an emotional involvement in this conflict. When we continue to receive boxes, notes, items, and supplies, it says to us that we have not become a footnote in the minds of John and Jane Q. Public.

The second blessing the AFSC gives to us is the opportunity to help the Iraqi people on an individual level. One of the challenges of soldiering in any war is to fight the inevitable onset of emotional fatigue. It is easy to begin to see all people as the enemy, especially in this guerilla-war type setting. The simple act of giving a hospitalized, Iraqi child a beanie-baby helps us to rediscover the common humanity we all share, and it makes us less cold and formidable in the eyes of the local Iraqi people. An act of service grants both parties the ability to see each other’s humanity, which, quite frankly, is a gift from God, especially in a combat zone.

It is easy to find a message of hope in this quiet but powerful outreach. I am amazed at how nostalgia seems to plague all generations, from the “greatest generation” to the “flower children,” making them believe that they were the last ones to have any standards, whatever those standards were, or to do anything that was good and noteworthy. The willingness of our young men and women to make the sacrifice of service coupled with the support they receive from individuals and groups of all political stripes shows me that we still have some terrific people both in our country and in our military. The support we receive is also an act of subversion, for it shows the intellectual Brahmin of our society on both sides of the political spectrum that Americans are a little more sophisticated then suspected. Lastly, and most importantly, the support of the AFSC and groups like it will mean, no matter what the verdict given by historians on the need for and outcome of this war, an easier transition back home and back into society. While I am thankful for the help we have received, my heart is also sad when I think about the lack of support given to other veterans of earlier wars.

On behalf of the Troopers of the 3/8 Cavalry “Warhorse” Battalion, I would like to thank the Armed Forces Support Coalition for their efforts. It speaks volumes about the quality of your community and the values all her people espouse.

I can truly say that your video matches your audio.
CH (CPT) Kevin Wainwright
Warhorse Shepherd